This information is a general overview of how to help your child deal with trauma and loss and is not specific to this incident. 

Possible reactions due to trauma and loss for children under the age of six  

Disruption of family routines can make children irritable, angry and confused, or quiet and withdrawn. They long for things to be as they were. Some behaviours include: whining, wetting themselves, asking to be fed or dressed, not allowing parents out of their sight, terrified of crowds and a need to be continually held.  

Children who cling to their parents are expressing fears of separation in a very natural way. Because their security has been threatened (trauma; loss-death, separation, a move), they are trying to prevent anything from disrupting their feeling of being safe and protected. Security and comfort are provided by attaching to special blankets, animals etc. or habits such as thumb sucking and nail biting.  

How you can help:  

• Understand your child's regressive behaviour is normal and is usually temporary.  

• Try not to overreact. Relax. Over concern, nagging and punishment often cause undesirable behaviours to last longer.  

• Acknowledge, encourage and praise appropriate and positive behaviour.  

• Spend extra time with your children. Show them they are understood and loved and that you aren't upset by their regressive behaviour.  

• Clinging children need to know that you will come back. Be patient. Leave when necessary but don't go without telling them where you are going and that you will return. Give lots of extra praise, love and attention.  

• Keep the family together especially in the early days after a traumatic event such as disaster or loss. It is natural to want to protect your children and send them away from unpleasant situations, but this may add to their fears, not lessen them. Children need their parents or familiar adults around them as much as possible.  

• Return to regular family routines as soon as possible. This includes re-establishment of bedtime schedules and having playmates over. Familiar routines are comforting for a child.  

Possible reactions by children ages six to 11

For complete article go to  http://www.sd72.bc.ca/documents/parents/How_to_talk_to_and_support_your_child_through_death_trauma_and_loss.pdf